Place one hand on your upper chest and one on your stomach. Take a breath, let your stomach swell forward as you breathe in, and fall back gently as you breathe out. Get a steady rhythm, taking the same depth of breath each time. The hand on your chest should have little or no movement.
When you’re anxious or stressed, your breathing can become quick and shallow, which reduces the amount of oxygen going to your organs. Learning how to breathe deeply can help reduce some of the physiological symptoms of anxiety.
Put aside some time each day to discover which relaxation techniques work for you. They can be active (going for a walk or swim, doing a puzzle, learning yoga, play sports) or passive (having a bath, reading a book, sitting in the park, listening to music, meditating).
Many forms of relaxation, like walking or sitting quietly, are very simple, easy to do and cost nothing. Others, like yoga or meditation, require some training or discipline. Going fishing or playing sports can be a great way of relaxing too.
You may see small mistakes as evidence that you’re unworthy. You may interpret your challenges as proof that you’re incompetent. Neither of these things are true, and you don’t have to believe them.
Byron Katie said “It’s not your job to like me. It’s mine.” There’s a difference between depending on people for support and depending on them for self-esteem.
We’re often afraid to show the messy, flawed, and vulnerable part of ourselves to others. It can be a tremendous relief when you do and someone accepts you just as you are.