Practice responding to distressing emotional states with grounding techniques and self-soothing strategies. If these are difficult or you need additional help, counselling can help you develop coping strategies, new perspectives and skills for managing difficult emotions.
If your emotions feel particularly intense, try an activity to make you feel better: run around; do 100 jumping jacks; put on the radio and dance; listen to a funny comedian; hold, stroke and hug a pet, pillow or teddy bear.
When engaging in self-soothing strategies for each sense, focus your attention completely on the task – with mindfulness. For each sense, try something comforting (touch: stretch; smell: flowers; taste: sip fruit juice; sight: watch the clouds; sound: sing) and see which works best for you.
Coping strategies focused on improving your mood that you can do on your own are sometimes described as self-soothing or self-care coping strategies. Effective self-soothing coping strategies may be those that involve one or more of the five senses (touch, taste, smell, sight, and sound).
When stressed, our inner critic is usually loudest. What is needed is a kinder, compassionate and soothing self. Try soothing words of comfort to say to yourself, such as “I know this is a difficult time for you”, “You are not alone”, “I believe in you.”
Self-soothing techniques include: taking a warm shower or bubble bath, going out into the warm sunshine, lighting scented candles or oil, listening to calming music, playing with or petting your pet, wrapping yourself in a blanket, and drinking hot chocolate slowly.
Self-soothing techniques help you relax and feel calm when you are feeling overwhelmed physically and emotionally. It does not mean you are running away from a situation, it means you are actively calming yourself so you can deal with it better.
Some grounding techniques include: touching various objects around you; stretching; walking slowly and noticing each footstep; noticing each inhale and exhale of your breathing; feeling the sensation of wiggling your toes inside your socks; eating fruit and describing the flavours to yourself.
You can try a variety of grounding techniques and rate the effectiveness of each technique in keeping you calm. Have others assist you in using these techniques by reminding you to practice them and use them as soon as you are feeling emotionally distressed.
To practice mentally grounding yourself, focus on some aspect of the physical world around you, rather than on your internal thoughts and feelings. Focus on the present rather than the past. Practice your grounding techniques so that they will come naturally when you are upset.