Short messages on Relationships issues from Respect Yourself, the guidance site for young people to help make good decisions in life.
If you talk to your sibling about how you’re feeling, use “I” phrases such as “I feel frustrated that you…”, so you don’t lay blame and put them on the defensive.
Talking about why you’re frustrated with your sibling can help you gain some insight on the situation, help them understand where you’re coming from, and can give you a chance to hear their side of the story.
Before you react to something your sibling has said or done, take a deep breath and think about the situation. Maybe you’re angry at your sibling or frustrated by a bigger underlying issue.
Although it might feel impossible sometimes, many siblings grow up to be close friends. It might take years and a lot of maturing before this happens, but in the meantime there are steps you can take to avoid fighting with your sibling and smooth out your relationship.
It takes strength and courage to take a step back and remind ourselves: Other people’s reactions are not about us, they are about them.
It’s important to express yourself clearly, and let your partner know how you feel about something, if it’s important to you. Understand that your partner is not the same person as you, and they will not always automatically understand how you feel without you telling them.
The key to a happy, healthy relationship is to have good communication. Learn to be open and say what you mean. Expecting your partner to read your mind all the time will cause unnecessary misunderstanding and confusion.
Sympathy is about feeling for someone: seeing their distress and realising that they are suffering. Compassion means to act on this, to ease their suffering. Empathy is about experiencing those feelings for yourself, as if you were that person, through the power of imagination.
We can increase our own level of empathy by getting out of our own head and actively imagining what someone else might be experiencing.
Being mindfully aware of your surroundings, especially the behaviours and expressions of other people, is crucial for empathy. Practicing mindfulness in this way helps us take the perspectives of other people yet not feel overwhelmed when we encounter their negative emotions.