If you want to feel more appreciative instantly, change your ‘I have to’ statements to ‘I get to’. ‘I get to walk across town’ will help you appreciate the the sights, sounds, smells and movement you encounter that others may not be able to.
We spend so much of our time focusing on what is lacking in our lives. We focus on being, doing, and having more in our lives. When we focus on more, we become blind to all we are, all we can do and all we have in our lives, right now.
“Be thankful for what you have, you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never, ever have enough.” ~ Oprah Winfrey
Before you speak, let your words pass through three gates: Is it true? Is it necessary? Is it kind?
There’s no “one size fits all” way to feel comfortable and enough within ourselves. There are many different paths to the same destination, and the right path for us is the one that fits our values, feels truthful, and helps us connect with whom we truly are.
Gently challenge your inner critic by asking “Is that really true?”, “What are the other alternatives here?”, “How would I respond if my best friend was telling me this?” and “Who would I be without this belief? What would I do differently?”
Everyone feels like or fears they are not good enough at some point or another. Fearing that we are not good enough doesn’t make us not good enough; it just makes us human. Remembering this can help you feel less alone if you’re feeling “not good enough”.
Encourage your inner mentor with simple exercises like keeping a “have done” list (as opposed to a “to do” list), taking time each week to reflect on positive experiences, new opportunities, things you feel proud of, and lessons learned.
Your inner mentor shows you things you can improve, in a very different tone to your inner critic. They balance constructive criticism with acknowledging everything you’re getting right, asking open questions like “How could you approach that differently in the future?”
Your inner critic highlights all the things you’re doing wrong, usually with a big helping of shame and judgement on the side. You can learn to turn down the volume on this part of your internal dialogue and turn up the volume on your “inner mentor”.
