Change can be frightening, and it’s important to avoid making decisions that are based in fear. Try to address your fears about the changes coming your way, rather than avoiding them.
Look for ways to feel more in control with change that is coming your way. For example if you are moving to a new house, research it as much as possible before you move. What shops are nearby? What things will help you to ease into your new environment?
Looking for opportunities to exert control may also help you to adapt to change. Try thinking of all of the little things that you can control in your daily life, such as what you have for dinner or what you do on your days off from work.
If you’re moving to a new town, view it as an open-ended adventure – do research on your new home, plot out your “visit”, and talk to new people for advice and tips on how to eat, play, and live like a “local”.
If you’re facing a serious illness, allow yourself to grieve for what has been lost (your independence, certain abilities, your long-term future, etc.), and don’t discount the coping releases of a hearty laugh and a shoulder to cry on.
If you’re starting a new job, try to prioritise completing tasks that complement your existing skills (so you can feel good about doing them well), and that allow you to build a rapport with your new co-workers.
Sometimes, you’ll take two steps forward, and one step back. That’s normal and healthy. Don’t judge yourself too harshly for slip-ups or backslides; rather, keep yourself focused on the positive steps you have made and will make next.
If your pet has died, try not to obsess over “When am I going to get over this?”. Instead, focus on small steps in your adjustment process: put away the leash; be able to pass the park without getting upset; and, eventually, feel the urge to get a new one.
While you want to visualise the big picture and see yourself happily adjusted to a major change occurring, you also need to focus your energies on the here and now of the adjustment process, in your adaptation to the new reality that faces you.
Major life changes, like a car accident or winning the lottery, can “happen overnight”, but your adjustment period won’t. Try to visualise the stages of the change and imagine the end of the process, when you have adjusted to the new circumstances.