When stressed, our inner critic is usually loudest. What is needed is a kinder, compassionate and soothing self. Try soothing words of comfort to say to yourself, such as “I know this is a difficult time for you”, “You are not alone”, “I believe in you.”
Self-soothing techniques include: taking a warm shower or bubble bath, going out into the warm sunshine, lighting scented candles or oil, listening to calming music, playing with or petting your pet, wrapping yourself in a blanket, and drinking hot chocolate slowly.
Peer pressure isn’t always a negative thing. It can be a positive influence and help challenge or motivate you to do your best. It’s helpful to recognise that peer pressure can also be negative, and can result in you doing something that doesn’t fit with your sense of right and wrong.
You might try to live up to other people’s expectations, but it’s important to be mindful to not have other people’s expectations cloud what you want. If you’re dealing with peer pressure, you’re not the only one.
For those who have a mental health issue, there might be periods of time when things aren’t manageable. Harder times can be triggered if your friend is stressed, or if he or she has recently experienced a traumatic event or changed medication, which can trigger the characteristics of the mental illness.
Having the contact numbers of people like your friend’s doctor could be important if you need to help your friend through a crisis, or if your friend is saying or doing things that worry you about his or her safety.
If you try something and it doesn’t work out, it might feel painful in the short-term, but you’ll feel much better and prouder of yourself looking back and knowing you’ve tried, than looking back at a missed opportunity.
When you think that something has to go exactly to plan or it’s a total failure, you’re less likely to try things, less open to feedback that will help you improve, and less likely to grow.
Self-soothing techniques help you relax and feel calm when you are feeling overwhelmed physically and emotionally. It does not mean you are running away from a situation, it means you are actively calming yourself so you can deal with it better.
Some grounding techniques include: touching various objects around you; stretching; walking slowly and noticing each footstep; noticing each inhale and exhale of your breathing; feeling the sensation of wiggling your toes inside your socks; eating fruit and describing the flavours to yourself.