Mindfulness isn’t about making bad thoughts go away, but about seeing them as mental events. Imagine standing at a bus station and seeing ‘thought buses’ coming and going without having to get on them and be taken away. With gentle persistence this is possible.
You don’t have to take abuse from anyone. No-one deserves to be abused. You are allowed to walk away, to stick up for yourself, to say “I understand that you are hurting, but I can’t allow it to hurt me in return.”
As we go about our day, doing small mindful things such as noticing the sensations of things, the food we eat, and the air moving past the body as we walk, has huge power to interrupt our ‘autopilot’ mode we often use day to day, and gives us new perspectives on life.
Most of us have issues that we find hard to let go and mindfulness can help us deal with them more productively. We can ask: ‘Is trying to solve this by brooding about it helpful, or am I just getting caught up in my thoughts?’
The phrase “Hurt people hurt people” means that people who are hurting lash out at others, causing them pain, whether intentionally or not. You can choose to take in that anger and lash out in return, or you can choose to rise above and react to that person with compassion and understanding.
“Those who hurt us are usually hurting themselves, and their pain may be so strong that they are not even aware they are hurting us.” – Joyce Meyers
Mindfulness lets us stand back from our thoughts and start to see their patterns. We can train ourselves to notice when our thoughts are taking over and realise that thoughts are simply ‘mental events’ that do not have to control us.
Mindfulness allows us to become more aware of the stream of thoughts and feelings that we experience, and to see how we can become entangled in that stream in ways that are not helpful.
Mindfulness is a form of meditation, a tool you can use in daily life to lower stress, improve focus, or treat anxiety or depression. You can use it when you are stressed about an exam, anxious in social situations, and many other difficult times.
“Mindfulness” is a mental state achieved by focusing your awareness on the present moment, while calmly acknowledging and accepting one’s feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations.