Short messages on Mental health, stress and anxiety issues from Respect Yourself, the guidance site for young people to help make good decisions in life.
If you’re feeling pressured, talk to someone outside the situation, like a friend, parent or teacher. They are in a good position to help you identify expectations and help you work out strategies to deal with them.
When you’re at your busiest, a short break can rejuvenate your mind and increase your productivity. These breaks will help you regain your sanity and reflect on your recent actions so you can be sure they’re in line with your goals.
Start being attentive to your stress level and take short breaks. Slow down. Breathe. Give yourself permission to pause, regroup and move forward with clarity and purpose.
Take a little time every day to clear your thoughts, and it will be a lot easier to tame the fear-based voice that makes you feel bad about yourself.
Too much pressure from others’ expectations can affect you psychologically (feeling helpless, depressed or low), socially (relationship problems like fighting or poor communication, or difficulty concentrating at school or work) and physically (feeling tired or ill).
You may not catch every self-critical thought, but with practise over time you’ll catch more and more, and the progress will add up.
Once you identify a limiting belief – such as “I’m not lovable” – you can start to change it by looking for evidence to support the opposite belief.
Others place expectations on you: they may want the best for you, and want you to have what they couldn’t. Some may try to place their principles on you, where their values are not ones that you would choose for yourself, and expect you to live up to them as they had to.
Everyone has goals and expectations for themselves. Some feel that meeting high expectations is the only way to gain the approval of others, or that achievement is the only way to be happy. Some set high expectations for themselves to push them to strive for and achieve bigger and better things.
If you feel yourself getting overwhelmed by a situation, step back and realise this feeling isn’t permanent – nothing is. Then focus on action steps – on the things you can control. What can you do today to proactively create a solution?