When you’re faced with a difficult situation, ask “What’s the best thing I can do to resolve this problem?” Work through the options one step at a time. Sometimes you may find yourself in a situation that you can’t change, no matter how much you would like things to be different.
Coping strategies might include: challenging your negative self-talk; talking to people who can support you; relaxing and reflecting; and distracting yourself from the problem by getting involved in other enjoyable activities.
When we feel like reacting negatively to someone, they are helping to bring out what we haven’t healed in ourselves. How can there be blame and anger towards those that bring up our shadows? Instead, we could replace our resentment with compassion for ourselves and those who hurt us.
We all have invisible wounds and we’ll do anything to avoid them being touched. If someone else accidentally touches our wounds, we act as if they caused them. But, they didn’t cause them, and they cannot heal them. They are our wounds and we have the power to heal them.
It takes strength and courage to take a step back and remind ourselves: Other people’s reactions are not about us, they are about them.
It’s important to express yourself clearly, and let your partner know how you feel about something, if it’s important to you. Understand that your partner is not the same person as you, and they will not always automatically understand how you feel without you telling them.
The key to a happy, healthy relationship is to have good communication. Learn to be open and say what you mean. Expecting your partner to read your mind all the time will cause unnecessary misunderstanding and confusion.
When you develop coping strategies, you’re able to build resilience. You’re able to see things in a better perspective and you’ll feel much better about how you handled a certain situation.
In some situations, despite our best efforts, we still can’t fix the problems we find ourselves in. Coping strategies can help you learn to accept situations that are beyond your control and find ways to help you feel better even if the problem still exists.
Advice and support is available after a miscarriage from hospital counselling services and charity groups. You can contact Miscarriage Association (01924 200799) for support.