Emotional intelligence: you understand what’s going on in your head and heart; you don’t make hasty decisions on impulse; you can motivate yourself to delay gratification; you listen to, understand, and relate to other people well; you’re able to focus on other people.
To deal with emotional pain, you can develop emotional intelligence, learn to sit with negative feelings, and create situations for positive feelings.
Be aware that if you don’t deal with your feelings from events large and small now, they might end up later dealing with you.
The emotional pain that we are dealing with are really only thoughts.
“Pain is part of life and we can’t avoid it by resisting it. We can only minimize it by accepting it and dealing with it well.” – Lori Deschene
Even if you are disappointed that you did not get what you expected, and even if you are upset that you do not have what you want, it is possible to lead a good life if you can let go of your expectations and find reasons to be happy with what you have.
Life happens, and it may or may not turn out as you hope it will. Learn to work with what you have. You may find that you end up liking what you get if you let go of expectations that events need to happen in a certain way.
If you are lucky enough to have loved ones in your life, call them often. Visit them often. Instead of taking them for granted, share your life with the people you care about, who care about you.
You can either make a list of what you have, or you can make a list of what you do not have. The first list will bring you peace and happiness, while the second list will bring you only sadness. Being sad and focusing on what we do not have does not change the circumstances.
If you’re hurting, give yourself the necessary space and time to hurt, and be open about it. Talk to those closest to you, and tell them the truth about how you feel. Let them listen.